Calming myself down

Last night was a better night - at least until my husband woke me up in the middle of the night because he was ill.

I called my best friend, and she reminded me of who I am, of what I believe, and what I know deep in my heart that I have to do, even though I don't want to do it. It brought me a measure of peace that I haven't had since I realized what had happened.

The sleeping part of last night was rough simply because everyone in my house decided to wake up in the middle of the night. I had a really hard time quieting my brain to go back to sleep, but I did manage it around 3:30 am.

I've wanted to do some artwork to try releasing my emotions, but I haven't been able to bring myself to do it. I guess I have a hard time with things that are not concrete. I'm always looking for a grade, and art is so subjective that I haven't been able to let myself just create. I may try that again this weekend. It's just that I look at the blank page and freeze.